Thursday, 11 June 2015

Anti-Gentrification Double Bill

THE HOMEBODIES (dir. Larry Yust, 1974)

"When a quiet group of pensioners learn that their homes are to be torn down to make way for a block of flats, they decide to take action. What starts as an attempt to discourage the developers soon escalates into wholesale murder of both the developers and the construction workers."

BREAKIN' ELECTRIC BOOGALOOS (dir. Sam Firstenberg, 1984)

"A developer tries to bulldoze a community recreation center. The local breakdancers try to stop it."

Tuesday, 3 February 2015


"Crimes against children are the most heinous crime. That, for me, would be a reason for capital punishment because children are innocent and need the guidance of an adult society." 

- Clint Eastwood

Saturday, 15 November 2014

Runaway Train

“No beast so fierce but knows some touch of pity. 
But I know none, and therefore am no beast.”

- William Shakespeare, Richard III

Sunday, 2 November 2014

March of the Penguins - Amazon review

In case anyone is still doubtful in regard to the benefits that the internet has brought to the practice of film criticism...AMAZING review!

Via Autodespair

Monday, 8 September 2014

New luxury cinema service allows guests to sleep through film and have someone tell them what happens after

Dream Factory Consumers

With 5-star offerings such as reclining seats and waiter services already prevalent across many Gulf cinemas, film fans in need of a little more luxury will soon have a new option to choose from.
Landing in multiplexes over the next couple of months, CineSnooze is a brand new technology that is being billed as “the ultimate movie theatre experience”.

Upon entering the CineSnooze fitted cinema screen, each guest will be taken to their own freshly made bed and given a warm mug of hot chocolate to help sooth them off to sleep. Earbuds and an eyemask will also be provided so the film doesn’t interrupt them throughout the entire experience.
“We found that so many of our customers choosing cushioned premium seats were falling asleep within minutes of sitting down, so thought we should cater to their unspoken demands, which in this case was for pocket sprung mattresses, 100 per cent Egyptian cotton sheets and Hungarian goose down pillows,” said Javier Ghent, regional manager at ArabCinePlex, which has been developing the technology. 

But the real genius of CineSnooze comes into effect once the film has finished. Having been woken from their well-earned slumber, guests will sit down with a trained member of staff who will explain the film’s main story arc, central characters and plot themes, as well as providing details of essential quotes and scenes.
“We want to ensure that should a conversation regarding the film arise – whether it be about a lightweight Michael Bay actioner or a mind-boggling Jean-Luc Godard art house affair – all CineSnooze guests will be able to hold their own and offer a confident, well-considered critique,” added Ghent.

The first CineSnooze service is set to launch in Dubai next month, but tickets already on standby having sold out weeks ago. Cinemas in Abu Dhabi and Doha are now fitting dedicated CineSnooze rooms. “I see this becoming the next big deal in the region’s cinema industry,” said entertainment journalist Barry McQuigley. “Judging by the responses so far, it seems that film fans across the Gulf are crying out for the chance to put their heads down and sleep soundly through the latest multi-million dollar summer blockbusters.”
But while CineSnooze may take the premium, top-tier cinema crown, those in the cheaper seats also have something to look forward to.
“We’re going to be trialling a new concept where audiences can choose to lower the volume of the film should it begin to interrupt their conversations,” said Ghent.

Via The Pan-Arabia Enquirer

Saturday, 5 July 2014

Pasolini's Heretical Empiricism

"This language of production and consumption - and not the language of man - appears as implacably deterministic. It only wants to communicate functionally; it doesn't want to perorate or exalt or convince - advertising slogans see to all that."

- Pier Paolo Pasolini, Heretical Empiricism

Monday, 16 June 2014


That's exactly how the Swiss football team would look like according to the recent referendum on immigration.

Go $ hell!

Wednesday, 11 June 2014


Still from Darktown Strutters

Friday, 6 June 2014

Taliban willing to return all five Taliban leaders in exchange for Jennifer Lawrence

NORTHERN AFGHANISTAN: Less than 24 hours after the controversial prisoner swap between the US government and the Taliban, leaders of the militant group have announced that they would be happy to return all five Taliban leaders in exchange for Hollywood starlet Jennifer Lawrence. “We feel this is a fair deal that should appeal to Obama,” a leader of the Afghan Taliban told Al Jazeera. “Ok, we’ll throw in another three militants.”

 It is not the first time that the mujahedins express their love and respect for Hollywood stars. Back in the 80s in fact, they had fought side by side with John Rambo against the evil Russians. The love is apparently mutual, as the final credits of Rambo III remind us.

Final credits of Rambo III

Tuesday, 27 May 2014

Massive security operation to keep Jar Jar Binks off Star Wars set

ABU DHABI: UAE security forces have launched a massive ‘ring of steel’ security operation to stop irritating side kick, Jar Jar Binks, from reaching the new Star War film set.

“It would be a disaster for all humanity if this deeply annoying, demographic-driven and utterly vacuous irritant, who was only included in the ‘Phantom Menace’ to appeal to under-7s, were to make it into the next Star Wars franchise,” said Abu Dhabi police commander, Lt. Khalid Al Hosseni.
“The reputation of the armed forces is at stake,” he said. “Binks’ high-pitched, cloyingly ‘humorous’ antics will not be tolerated for the months that Star Wars is filming here,” he said. 

Binks, described as 172cm tall and from the Gungan tribe, was last seen on the perimeter fence of the set in the Western Region of the Abu Dhabi desert, swigging from a bottle and arguing with security guards that he should be allowed to speak to George Lucas.
“Imma have a rap with George Lucas, know what I’m saying Bro?” he said, in a deeply annoying and racial offensive take on Caribbean American speech patterns for which he has become globally despised. 

Binks, consistently voted the most tedious film character of all time, later returned to his hotel room in Abu Dhabi to sell junk bonds to Florida retirees over the phone.
“Imma only do phone sales part time,” he told our reporter. “Imma be a star again, know what I’m sayin’?” he added.

(Official Source: The Pan-Arabia Enquirer)